Is That a "Tick Tock" I Hear?

A baby will make love stronger, days shorter, nights longer, bankroll smaller, home happier, clothes shabbier, the past forgotten, and the future worth living for.  ~ Anonymous

To have a baby, or not to have a baby?  And if so ~ how???

Not how how ~ but how on earth do all the logistics work out? The closer I get to 30, the closer I see the end of my childbearing years looming ahead, and the more pressure I feel to make a decision right this minute.  People I went to high school and college with are starting to procreate in full force.  Whenever I meet a new little bundle of joy, naturally my heart skips a beat and I think "Well, of course I want this in my life".  Whenever I come across a screaming toddler, or even just a normal toddler being a toddler, I think "Well, I probably don't need this in my life right now".

But soft, sweet-smelling newborn or sticky, tantruming toddler ~ how do so many people get all their ducks in a row before starting a family?  People always say you can't wait for the perfect time to have a baby, or you'll never end up having them.  This makes sense to me ~ it's never convenient to spend months {or years} on little sleep; to increase your household spending exponentially without increasing {or possibly with decreasing} your income; to deal with stomach bugs, potty training, temper tantrums and the like.  But people make it work.  I understand that, and I think I'm ready for those types of sacrifices.  But I am a planner, and although I'm a happy person, I am also a worrier.  And because of these traits, I cannot get around the fact that it doesn't seem like my husband and I will ever be prepared {financially, mostly} to start a family ~ at least not before we're also ready for retirement.  So how do people do it, and everyday no less?

I have always wanted kids.  I was barely out of diapers myself when I started demanding to hold the babies at every family function {lucky for me, I have three younger brothers and eight younger cousins}.  I carried my poor brothers around on my hip until they were practically school-aged, and I started babysitting in middle school.  In the past few years, however, I've realized that whenever I spend time with friends children, even just for a couple hours, I leave exhausted.  At 29, am I already depleted of the energy it takes to keep up with little ones?

I've also always wanted to have a big family ~ I am one of five, and God-willing I have always hoped that I would have more than one or two children.  I love the relationships I have with my brothers, and I think sibling relationships are completely unique than any other type of friendship or relationship you have with other people your age.  I want my kids to experience that as well.  Homes full of kids are also full of happy {most of the time} chaos, conversation, laughter, lessons, and love. But with big families come big expenses ~ how can anyone afford kids these days?  I want my children to be able to have the sports, dance and music lessons they want; to be able to afford a shirt or a pair of jeans from whatever the trendy store of the moment is at that time {fingers crossed that Hollister's time has passed by then}; to be able to receive the coveted toys of the year on Christmas morning.  I don't need to be wealthy enough to lavish my children with whatever they want; but I want to be able to give them some things without breaking the bank.

There are so many other questions I have about knowing if or when you should start a family {Buy a house in this economy?; What if my baby is colic?; Could we afford for me to stay at home with the kids, and would I want to?; What if I get postpartum depression?} but this could very quickly turn from a blog entry into a novella.  I know in my heart I do want children, and even though the logistics really don't add up to me, I'm sure when we're ready as we'll ever be, we'll "figure it out" like everybody else does.  My husband, who once stated "They're just kids ~ how hard can it be?" will perhaps have to figure a bit more out than most.  As Charles Osgood once said "Babies are always more trouble than you thought ~ and more wonderful".  I hope that someday, sooner rather than later, we are ready to experience that trouble and wonder.

xoxo
Bean


{photo credit: heidihope.com}